Food Fight
by WriterAtHeart2
Summary: Halt, Will, and Gilan have a food fight. A short, little one-shot.


**This is just a really weird idea I got. Please review.**

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_SPLAT. _An egg hit and splattered all over the window. The window was a disgusting mess.

"What the—?" Halt whipped around. That was a big mistake, because just then, another egg came hurtling at his head. Yolk and egg white dripped all over the grizzled Ranger's face, causing him to shake himself like a puppy dog. "GILAN!" shouted Halt, glaring menacingly at his former apprentice.

"What?" Gilan answered, holding an egg and preparing to throw it at Halt. "It's a food fight!" Another egg came hurtling at Halt's neck. But Gilan hadn't thrown it. Will had.

Usually, Halt didn't take part in these silly childish games—but when someone messes with Halt, Halt gets revenge.

Halt got up from his chair, clutching his coffee mug tightly in his hand. "It's on," he breathed. Then he splattered coffee all over Gilan, who was not fast enough to duck. Gilan glared at the satisfied Halt. Then he picked up a cookie, and hurled it at Will. The cookie was thrown with such force that it crushed against Will's head and broke into a thousand little crumbs. Will hadn't expected a cookie to be chucked at his head, so right then and there he got a head full of little cookie crumbs. "Oh no you didn't," breathed Will. He splashed Gilan with a mug of coffee and ducked as Halt chucked an egg at him.

Gilan ducked as a cookie nearly hit him. He grabbed a handful of coffee beans from a nearby bag and threw them all at Halt, who yelped as at least twenty little pebble-sized beans rained on him. Then an egg was hurled at him (courtesy of Will) and Halt got a face-full of egg yolk.

Laughing, Will the salt-shaker and crept behind Halt, who was busy throwing cookies at Gilan. Then Will sprang up, feverishly shook the salt onto Halt's head, and waited until the grizzled Ranger noticed.

After about thirty seconds of shaking, Halt noticed a peculiar sensation on his head. He felt at his head. There were tiny little stones sitting on his head. Halt whipped around, and saw Will laughing uncontrollably on the ground. Halt grabbed at his head again, and picked off a stone. He inspected it. It was salt!

"ARGH!" Halt shouted, glaring at the laughing Will.

Meanwhile, Gilan was gathering a few potatoes under the table. Still laughing at Halt, he began stepping on the potatoes to make them mashed. _A face full of mashed potatoes would be _lovely, he thought. Once the potatoes had been successfully mashed on the ground, Gilan grabbed a nearby spoon and spooned a heap of mashed potatoes on it. Then he flung it at Halt, who was still glaring at Will. The spoon hit Halt's back and mashed potatoes splattered all over Halt's hair.

"SALT AND MASHED POTATOES!" bellowed Halt. "ARGH!" Grabbing the nearest thing he could find (which happened to be an ice cube), Halt threw it at Gilan, who used a chair as a shield. The ice cube somehow bounced off the chair and instead hit Will on the nose.

"Ow!" cried Will, massaging his nose. He got off of the floor and threw a handful of carrots in Gilan's direction. Being an expert in swordsmanship, Gilan grabbed a wooden rod (where he got it no one knew) and batted the tiny carrots out of his way.

Will angrily fished an apple out of his pocket (he'd wanted to give it to Tug) and flung it at Halt, who had opened his mouth at the same moment. The apple instead fell into Halt's mouth and stuck there (who knew Halt's mouth was so big?) Halt tried to shout but the apple muffled his noise. Laughing, Gilan stepped forward.

"Here, let me help you," he said, walking toward Halt. Halt felt stupid. He never asked for help. Gilan reached for the apple, but instead of pulling it out, Gilan whipped out a container of cream cheese and fished out a knife. Using the knife, Gilan applied a fair amount of cream cheese around Halt's mouth and some on the apple.

"There," Gilan said (trying very hard to keep a straight face). "In a few minutes that apple will be really stuck." At this, Will burst out laughing and stepped forward. That was a mistake, since there was a banana peel on the ground. Will slipped and fell on his bum.

"Now who's laughing?" Gilan said, laughing like a maniac. Then he pulled out a basket of berries. Not just any berries. Blueberries.

Halt made an effort to spit the apple out. Unfortunately for Gilan and Will, he succeeded. The apple clunked to the floor.

_"Nooooooo_!" cried Halt, reaching for the berries.

"Life has many disappointments, Halt," Gilan said calmly. "That's what you taught me." Patting Halt on the back, Gilan threw the blueberries at Will. Blue juice splattered and covered the young apprentice's face.

"My precious berries..." Halt groaned. "My precious, precious berries..."

Despite the gross blue substance covering his face, Will grinned along with Gilan.

Halt glared and grabbed a nearby basket of strawberries. He flung half at Gilan, and half at Will. He didn't even care to see if he'd hit. He quickly grabbed an eggplant. It would create quite a bruise on the person it hit. Halt flung it at Gilan, and then grabbed the rest of the ice cubes. He quickly breathed warm air on them, and right away they melted. Then Halt splashed the freezing cold water on Will, who had strawberry juice in his hair. Gilan was the one sporting the eggplant bruise.

Halt smiled to himself. Time to show them what a real Ranger could do. Halt rummaged in the icebox, and pulled out some uncooked wheat noodles. He sprayed the stiff noodles at Will, but Will was quicker than that. The young apprentice shouted "Hi-yah!" and stuck out his hand. He chopped the stiff noodles in half with a swift wave of an arm, which left Gilan and Halt raising their eyebrows.

"You can do that?" asked Gilan, inspecting Will's hands. "You must have good reflexes. Hands like those are strong enough to be a sword master."

Will grinned, but his grin faded when he saw what a mess the kitchen was. The others followed his gaze and realized that they would have to clean it up.

"I'm not cleaning it up," said Gilan immediately.

"Me neither," said Will a second after.

That left Halt. "I...clean?" said Halt weakly. The cleaning job was for apprentices and apprentices alone.

"Yes, you clean," said Gilan. Then with a wink at Will, he left the kitchen. Will followed after him. "Have fun cleaning!" the apprentice called gleefully.

Halt glared. He would have to get revenge.

THE END


End file.
